One of my roles as an Aging Life Care Professional® is to connect clients with reputable home care agencies and help set up caregiver services. I have learned that it takes a lot of research to make a perfect match, so when I meet a caregiver that stands out, I hold onto their contact information for future use. On January 4th, I received a text from Ace, one of the exceptional caregivers that I am talking about. He told me that he was available for a live-in assignment and asked if I knew anyone needing care. While I was going through my list of clients, a crazy thought went through my mind. How about my own mom? She has been so unhappy lately living at the assisted living and is no longer thriving, needing more cognitive support, but refusing any additional care.
She talks nonstop about moving home and even spends much of her nights collecting boxes from the recycling room to pack her things in. So why not move home with Ace and see what happens?
It may sound like a no-brainer, but if we base this decision on history, many of my siblings would argue that there is absolutely no way she would accept a 24-hour caregiver living with her in her own home. The only way to really know if it would work was to give it a try. The worst-case scenario, we try it for a few days and if it doesn’t work, we move her back. So, within a week, we came up with a plan. We flew my brother to town for a visit and told my mom that Ace was hired to help get the house ready and that if she wanted to stay at the house while her son was visiting, she would need to have someone stay there with them. She reluctantly agreed…
One thing I have learned in my career is that there is no ‘one solution.’ Often, my clients come to me for advice on difficult decisions for their loved ones. What may work for one family will not necessarily work for another. Decisions are never cut and dry, and one thing I try to convey is how important it is to do the research, consider all options, and then choose the one that seems to feel right at the time. Take things as they come and be prepared to shift directions when needed.”